Week 25 - "To reach the unreachable star"

Hello, everyone!

This week's quote is from Man of La Mancha's "The Impossible Dream." I haven't seen the play, but I've heard the song, and I'm sure there's a movie version out there somewhere. The reason for the quote will become clear later in the email.

Missionary work is basically going as it usually does here in Warren. We've been finding a few new people to teach, trying to help and keep track of the people we've been meeting with, and trying to contact the people we've been wanting to meet with but can't seem to catch. I'm noticing that a few significant people in our teaching pool are just super busy and don't want to commit to a certain time to meet. It's hard to tell them that they should prioritize us, considering what they're trying to do is provide for themselves and their families, keep their jobs and get ahead of the responsibilities they have, but at the same time, I want to communicate to them that what we have to give them can bless them with a great amount of peace, that the influence of the Spirit can help them know what they need to do to best provide for their families, and that they will see some temporal blessings as they make us a priority in their lives. It's not something I want to ask anyone to do, though. I now think of how Elijah might have felt asking the widow of Zeraphath to give him food and how she would be blessed for it. That seems like a terrible, awful way to test someone's faith, and I'd prefer not to do it with the people I'm teaching--I'm sure they would be blessed for prioritizing learning about the gospel, but I'm not sure they would respond well to us asking them to do it, and if they didn't do it, they would never see the fruits of such a sacrifice and might live the rest of their lives thinking the church and the people in it would ask too much of them. It's a difficult predicament. I've thought a little bit about the separating of the wheat and the tares, and I think part of that happens in missionary work as we come into people's lives and invite them to make choices: First they have to choose whether or not they want to listen to us, and then they have to choose whether they want to have us back, and then whether they want to keep commitments. As I see it, as we make correct choices, we distinguish ourselves more and more as wheat, and as we make the incorrect choices, we distinguish ourselves more and more as tares. But we know what happens to tares, and I don't necessarily want to be part of that process of identifying tares--in other words, I don't want to bring the choice to people who are going to make the wrong choice. They'll continue to have chances, of course--rejecting us is not the final say for them by any means--but it just feels like I'm participating in condemnation to some degree, and I'd prefer not to take part in that.

All that being said, it's wonderful to be able to take part in identifying and "harvesting" the wheat. We've met some really great people in the last couple of weeks, and some of them are making real progress, though, again, the attention of some is being drawn by their work and other responsibilities, and that can feel frustrating. It seems like the number of people in our teaching pool whom we can actually still visit with and teach is rapidly decreasing. I guess I'll just have to pray more that Heavenly Father will help them--maybe I have not been asking enough for those blessings for the people I've been teaching.

So what were some of the good things that happened this week? Well, we doubled into Ashtabula and had a pretty good day. I was with our district leader, Elder Hall, and together we found 5 new people for him and Elder Lewis to teach that day. For those of you not currently on missions, a "new person" is classified as someone who we have taught one or more principles to, who has committed to do something, and who we have a return appointment with. The "Standards of Excellence" in the mission include us finding 5 new people to teach every week, so we were able to help Ashtabula meet that in a day. It felt great. They'll be doubling into Warren with us for tomorrow, so hopefully we'll see similar success.

On Friday we had two of the training specialists, Elder Watkins and Elder McInnes, come and double into our area, and that was a cool thing to be able to take part in. We were able to get some guidance on how to improve in our service here in Warren, but we also got some affirmation: Elder McInnes served in Warren before, and he and I were together that day, and at the end of the day he told us that Warren was sort of near and dear to his heart, and he was proud of what we were doing in the area. Basically, we have the approval of a former missionary who loved the area, so that's cool. It feels good to get that reassurance. We were able to be pretty effective that day--we had a lot of teaching appointments and things, and although we didn't find any new people to teach per se, we did get work done.

Saturday was great, too. So there's this guy named Billy that the sisters encouraged us to go see, and he's fixing up a house in Warren that he bought and making it how he likes it (he has sort of a gift for construction and mechanical things and so forth), and he's faced some opposition, like the house being condemned when he was in the process of cleaning it up, but he's been able to push through it and such. He's also helped a guy in Alaska with some fishing, and he's going back in a few months to do that, so that was cool that I was able to make that connection (my brother, Max, served in Alaska). But more than that, there are so many doctrinal principles that he understands very, very deeply. He seems very elect. By the way, if I haven't mentioned it in a previous email, President Stratford told me in interviews once that the elect will have a sort of familiarity with the gospel--that it will seem familiar to them. We've met quite a few people like that recently. Anyhow, we're going back Wednesday to help him primer his house so he can paint it, and hopefully we'll be able to teach him more about what we believe. He also said he's open to coming to church, but he didn't come this last week, so we're hoping he comes next week.

Yesterday was a little difficult. Every person we approached on the street in the evening was not interested in speaking with us, and told us so very dismissively, and one told us so pretty profanely. It was overcast, and again, I feel like there's something about Ohio where the people get really affected by the weather. Or maybe I just didn't interact with people enough back home on days like that or didn't notice it. I don't know--it's just weird. Anyhow, we did meet a few people who might be interested in hearing more about our message, including one who, again, seemed like he disliked organized religion for the same reasons he might like ours--there were principles he was talking about that are very much a part of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ.

Again, back to the idea of wheat and tares, I'm beginning to understand how that process is happening. It occurred to me after we had that negative interaction yesterday (and one or two others). We've been talking to a lot of people who bemoan the state of the world, and I've been thinking a lot about how I want to just binge a lot of things when I finally get back home in about a year and a half: I want to watch a bunch of movies, play a bunch of video games, and just, like, not leave the house for a good week or two. We also meet a lot of people who drink or smoke or do drugs, and it has been said that sin is the result of deep, unmet needs. We had also just talked to someone about how it's the little things we do every day to help people that make a difference in the world. All those ideas were sort of swirling around in my mind and then aligned, and I was struck with an insight: This world feels like a crappy place sometimes, and never more so than now, in the dispensation of the fulness of times. We've been told by the scriptures that things are going to get really, really bad before Christ comes a second time, and it's interesting, because the people who want to do and be good are turned away from the world--they don't want any part of it--so they begin to withdraw and separate themselves from those who don't want to do and be good. In addition, some of those who find themselves in dire and desparate circumstances have a tendency to want to numb the pain, and some of those people also withdraw into themselves. Some drink themselves into a stupor, some take drugs and get high, some look for momentary pleasures to feel relief from the pain (though these often bring a price of later, greater pain), and some retreat into a fantasy.

[A side note to this: We're encouraged to ask everyone (including people we've just barely contacted) for referrals, and we often get the response that they don't even know their neighbors. That's the world that we're living in. Many people also bemoan the division they see between religions and other groups, and I think that's another thing that makes us and them disinclined to reach out to the people in proximity: We're afraid of a negative reaction.]

Ultimately this choosing not to reach out to others, not to welcome and invite and love the people who aren't like us, causes us to separate. It's likely that only makes us more lonely, misunderstood, and afraid, and it removes good influences from the people most in need of a good influence, which might cause them to sink into despair and turn to drugs and alcohol for help, which can cause them to be a bad influence on others and push away some of the people who care about them, which makes them more lonely, and so on and so forth. Basically, the solutions of avoidance or temporary relief that we're turning to in response to the world we live in are ultimately allowing it to get worse and worse. If you want to make a difference in the world, you have to reach out to the people who might need your help. You have to let the people who are in danger know that you love them. You have "to be willing to march into hell for a heavenly cause" and "fight the unbeatable foe" and "strive when your arms are too weary."

Good people are hurting, and they need our help. If you help them, they might have the strength to reach out and help others. Mourn with those that mourn, comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and be a witness of God at all times, in all things, and in all places that ye may be in, even unto death. That's the way you can make a difference. So if you're reading this, do me a favor: If you haven't fulfilled your ministering assignment, do it. If you have (or you don't have one), reach out to someone who you know is struggling and offer your help. Then, if you have time, email me about it: I'd love to know what your experience is like. I know that as you do so, you will be accompanied by the spirit, who will lift you up and help you improve your own situation, and you will have made the world a better place.

Elder Davis

Sorry, I forgot to add a few things:

1. "She's changing her name from Kitty to Karen..."

2. Elder McInnes and I

3. From left, myself, Elder Watkins, Elder Anderson and Elder McInnes

4. I made meatballs. They've been pretty good.

5. We went to a place called Aldi that sells good and super cheap food in Ohio, and we need to go there all the time now. Also, I think there was something wrong with their sign for bananas, but I'm not going to question it.

6. We got blocked by a freight train (Inception, anyone?) on our way to an appointment in Ashtabula.